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suitel(2012/8/6 23:09:26)  点击:14479  回复:0  
     How do you persuade someone to do something they might not feel so keen about?

    Flattery–the art of offering pleasing compliments–will often help you get what you want.

  Lucy Kellaway is a writer and columnist with the Financial Times. One day, she got an e-mail asking her to go to Scotland to give a speech for a charity.

 She wanted to decline the invitation because there were good reasons to do so: Scotland is far away from London; she had never heard of the charity and barely knew the woman who wrote the message. Yet rather than say no, the columnist found herself saying yes instead.


    Because she was flattered. The e-mail began: “We haven’t met yet, but I hope we will.” The woman went on to profess a huge admiration for Kellaway’s columns and claimed the charity’s committee would be “utterly over the moon” if she turned up.

    It would be hard for anyone to turn this woman down.

    Writing in the Financial Times, Kellaway says that even though she didn’t believe the woman was really her fan, she was softened up nevertheless.

    It is odd but true. According to a recent study from Hong Kong University of Science and Technology, flattery works even when the recipient knows it is insincere.

    The Harvard Business Review recounts an experiment researchers did to prove the effectiveness of flattery.

    A group of students were identified as potential shoppers. They were given a flyer from a fictional clothing shop which said: “We are contacting you directly because we know that you are a fashionable and stylish person. Your dress sense is not only classy, but also chic…”

    They knew the compliment was impersonal, and the motive was plain–the flyer asked them to shop at the store.

    But the “shoppers” were charmed anyway and acted on their positive feelings by choosing a coupon from the store that had flattered them.

    Flagrant flattery may sway customers, but that doesn’t mean it can work in every situation.

     Should you use flattery on your boss at work to get quicker promotion? Better not, according to a research done by the University at Buffalo in the US. Their study showed that empty flattery often *backfires. Successful flattery takes skill. Researchers found out that insincere flattery often produces a negative response.

    If a supervisor sees a *subordinate’s flattery as a *ploy to get ahead, they will tend to rate the employee lower on job performance.

     But if the flatterer is skillful enough to fool the supervisor into thinking his or her praise is sincere, they will usually get positive feedback.

    An article in The Economist agrees and argues that the ambitious should master the art of flattery.

    It quotes Jennifer Chatman, of the University of California, who conducted experiments in which she tried to find a point at which flattery became ineffective. It turned out there wasn’t one.

     Chatman says: “People who bring positive information, who make the boss feel good about the decisions he or she has made, who build up the boss’s confidence, those people are going to do better.”

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